Find out why people with ADHD can struggle more with boredom in retirement, and get practical strategies to create purpose, stimulation, and a fulfilling retired life.
When I look ahead to retirement, I don’t always feel the excitement that other people seem to. A more honest emotion I feel is panic. And that’s not because I fear leaving work, or worry that I won’t have enough money. Instead, I am terrified I am going to be bored.
Being bored is one of my two biggest fears in life (the other is loneliness) and I have spent a lot of time and effort over the decades trying to avoid both.
The thought of waking up day after day with no purpose and having to find things to do is, quite frankly, the stuff of horror films for me. And the idea that the rest of my life will be spent like this sounds like hell.
Only recently did I learn I wasn’t alone in feeling like this. In fact, it’s a very common trait in people with ADHD. In case this realisation might help you too, I’m going to explain why people with ADHD get bored so easily, why it’s so painful and how you can make plans now to avoid boredom in retirement.
Why retirement can be harder for people with ADHD
Retirement is often sold as a reward for lifetime of work: endless freedom, no deadlines, and finally having all the time in the world to do whatever you want.
For many people, that sounds ideal. But if you have ADHD, it can quickly feel like a curse. That’s because people with ADHD need stimulation, structure and to be occupied in order to function properly. And what we usually don’t realise is that work provides us with this ‘scaffolding’.
Here are just some of the unseen benefits that work offers people with ADHD:
- A daily routine
- Time pressure and deadlines
- Social interaction
- Mental challenges
- Problem-solving opportunities
- External accountability
- New experiences
Even if you dislike your job, these elements help to support your ADHD brain. So when we retire, and these benefits disappear overnight, we can find ourselves lost. Suddenly there is no reason to get out of bed in the morning, no meetings to attend, no projects to complete, no colleagues to chat to, and no schedule demanding our attention.
What initially feels like freedom can gradually morph into a lack of direction and motivation.
Why your ADHD brain craves stimulation
ADHD is not just about having a problem paying attention; increasingly researchers are understanding it as involving differences in motivation and reward processing.
If you have ADHD, your brain is naturally dopamine-deficient and requires constant stimulation. You need novelty, challenge, urgency, interest and variety, and you struggle with tasks that are repetitive or lack immediate rewards.
With similar days, fewer responsibilities, less social contact, reduced mental challenge and less external demands, retirement can unintentionally create the perfect conditions for under-stimulation. This can manifest as feelings of:
- Restlessness
- Irritability
- Dissatisfaction
- Loneliness
- Difficulty relaxing
- Low motivation
- Increased anxiety
- Emotional flatness
Why boredom is so painful for people with ADHD
Many people imagine boredom as simply “having nothing to do.” But for people with ADHD, it can feel more like mental discomfort, restlessness, low mood, lack of stimulation, and a loss of purpose. In short it is miserable and painful.
Unlike ‘normal’ boredom, which can be manageable, ADHD boredom is persistent and firmly rooted in your brain’s reward system. Studies have found that people with ADHD may have lower tolerance for less stimulating environments, and when their brain isn’t getting enough engagement, discomfort can quickly build.
This can lead to finding activities that will temporarily give a short burst of stimulation, such as:
- Scrolling aimlessly on your phone
- Impulsive spending
- Excessive television watching
- Overeating
- Taking unnecessary risks
- Starting projects without finishing them
But the problem with activities like these is that they don’t give you the essential, long-term relief you need. And they certainly don’t make you feel any better afterwards. They’re a poor patch on a problem that won’t go away without a proper, lasting solution.
What can people with ADHD do to prevent retirement boredom?
The good news is that with some planning, retirement doesn’t have to mean endless boredom. Let’s look at some ways you can build a retired life that keeps boredom at bay.
Create a life with flexible structure
Many people avoid schedules in retirement because they want freedom. But having nothing to do day after day is more like a prison for people with ADHD. Instead, you are more likely to benefit from some kind of flexible structure to your life. This can be as simple as:
- Waking up at the same time every day
- Scheduling exercise
- Planning social activities
- Setting regular project times
- Keeping weekly commitments
Think of it as creating a framework for your life, rather than a strict timetable. It’s important to pre-plan weeks that are balanced with activities and structure, because once the dreaded ADHD boredom sets in you may not be capable of planning or enjoying an activity.
Build variety into your week
Instead of repeating the same routine every day, keep your brain engaged with a variety of activities, locations, people, challenges and themes. For example, maybe on Mondays you volunteer, on Tuesdays you go to fitness classes and have lunch with friends, on Wednesdays you go to a class, on Thursdays you join a walking group and on Fridays you do tasks around the home.
The novelty of each day being different will help to maintain your engagement, and having purpose and interaction each day will mean you can enjoy your down time when you get home.
Keep learning
People with ADHD often have an over-developed curiosity. This means you need to keep feeding your hungry brain once you stop work, and actively learning can be a quick win. Here are some ideas to get you started:
- Learn a language
- Take online courses
- Study history
- Explore technology
- Join workshops
- Learn music or art
- Pick up a new craft
Find purpose beyond work
Our purpose doesn’t disappear when we retire – it simply changes form. Without the structure and stimulation that work once provided us with, retirement can become difficult. But by consciously finding new purpose, we can plug that gap.
Here are some suggestions to help you find new purpose and evade boredom:
- Mentor people
- Volunteer
- Join community projects
- Take up creative work
- Get more involved with your family
- Start a small business or side project
Make new social connections
It’s often not until we leave work that we realise how much social interaction it provided. And people with ADHD thrive on the stimulation and engagement they get from being around other people.
So make sure you find ways to nurture existing social connections and build new ones once you retire. Here are some quick suggestions:
- Join clubs
- Attend community events
- Participate in interest groups
- Schedule regular meetups
- Volunteer regularly
Think about a hybrid retirement
Retirement does not have to be all-or-nothing. You can reduce your days working in your current career, or leave work and maybe pursue a new career or job working part time. (This can even help to extend your life.)
Many adults with ADHD find meaning and satisfaction in retirement with part-time work, consulting, freelancing, teaching, mentoring, seasonal jobs and passion projects. A smaller amount of work can give you structure and purpose, while preserving your freedom as a retiree.
How can you prevent ADHD boredom when you retire?
Personally, I have been thinking about retirement and how I will avoid boredom for a few years now, and have been already putting things in place. I have started doing more yoga classes in the week, taken on volunteering roles and nurtured my social connections. Even starting this website was partly to ensure I still have something I enjoy that will challenge and occupy me!
And what about you? The above suggestions are good advice for anyone in retirement, but if you too have ADHD, they could be a life raft for you, and avoid you drowning in a listless pit of inactivity and inertia.
For people with ADHD, the most satisfying retirement isn’t built around stopping activities; instead it is rooted in replacing work with meaningful challenges, relationships, learning, and purpose. And that is something that requires conscious planning.
